Re-hash.

I have fallen in love over and over.

And I have never learned how to let go.. of anyone.

The moments I think I am free.. I look back.

And I realize I will never be free of these things.

They make me.

They build me up.

They tear me apart.

They give me strength.. yet they are my greatest weakness.

I had convinced myself that there was never anything between us.

But then you show me evidence.

And I know that there was something overwhelming.

I will never understand how it went from that to this.

And there are things I will never be able to forget.

But at the same time.. those memories will never be the same..

After these past 6 months.

I still can't be sure if this torment was worth what we shared.

But what we shared was honest and true.

And for a long time.. I couldn't ever imagine it ending.

Its rare to feel a true forever type of love.

The kind that hides all faults and is pure.

Loving you made me a better person for a while.

And for a while.. I think we were each other's very best thing.

You were my comfort, my sanity, and my protector.

When things went to shit, you made me believe it would all work out.

We shared my twin bed every night..

and I still couldn't get close enough to you.

I remember loving you completely..

And never stopping to wonder why.

I remember the first time I lost you..

How I felt myself break in two.

All of this touch and go..

All of the awful things we have said to each other.

And all of the trust we have broken..

Its stripped us of what used to be real..

And replaced it with a barely believable idea.

I am sorry that I have forgotten.

And it hurts so bad to remember you..

Even if its just briefly.. Just for this moment.

If I could, I would take it all back.. and try to fix it.

But I guess thats how we got in this position in the first place.

I have never wanted to let go.

And before I knew it..

You became the furthest thing from me.